Well, it's another day since I started this endeavor. Today I had a few more cigarettes than yesterday. Woke up late after working on Christmas gifts late into the evening last night. Started well, had 1 before work and then broke down throughout the day and had a few more than anticipated.
For my second post - I thought I would outline some of my history regarding smoking. My earliest memories of smoke and smoking both involve my Mom's family.
The first: I was riding somewhere with my Papa (maternal Grandfather). He stopped a picked up a few cartons of cigarettes. I remember thinking that smoking was bad, and that he shouldn't have them. I told him so, and then I threw them out the window.
This in and of itself is bad, in its way... but I threw them into a ditch, which happened to be filled with water. By the time Papa stopped the car and went back to get them, they were ruined. All I really remember is that he was really, REALLY upset with me. At the time I didn't understand. I was trying to help him.
I have since "joked" (but I think there's some truth there) that now that I smoke, I would understand if he HAD wanted to kick my ass.
The second: My aunt smoked for a long time. I remember fondly riding in her car and liking the smell of old cigarettes. It might have had something to do with just thinking that she was the coolest person that I knew. I look up to her still... it has NOT a little bit to do with the fact that she always treated me like a person, an equal... not a kid.
I don't know what it was. To be honest - it's one of the last things that I really remember smelling.
Alright. Late enough already. Happy Holiday!
It's so intersting to hear the childhood memories of someone who chose to smoke. I was in a similar situation, however, my feelings were the exact opposite. I had an uncle that was tons of fun. He always teased us, tickled us with his scratchy beard and gave us all sorts of other fun attention. But he was a heavy smoker. I could usually put up with the smell on his clothes for several minutes at a time, but I absolutely dreaded having to ride in his pickup. The smell was sooo terrible. I always think about how much closer we might have been if not for the constant stench of old cigarette smoke. This was probably my strongest influence in never wanting to even try a single puff. Its amazing to me to hear that someone could have fond memories of the smell of a smoky car. I realize it may have had more to do with how you viewed your aunt and less to do with the actual smell. Regardless, it makes it easier for me to understand why some people might choose to smoke. Oh yeah, congrats on your decision and good luck!
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