Today was another day full of Christmas spirit. Jennifer, Forrest and I spent some time with two groups of phenomenal friends, and I smoked. Not too much. But not a small amount, either. I did find out that this winter, the cold/dry air is apparently too much for my hands. I'm guessing that it has a lot to do with my smoking, given that my hands are out in the cold... and now they're not only chapped, but they're bleeding. UGH!
Maybe this will go away on its own?
6 cigarettes today, and 1 more likely for tonight. I haven't decided yet...
Today was a great day, though. I'm sad to say that again I didn't work out. I'm feeling REALLY tired all the time, and when I think about quitting I'm not sure how I feel. Part of me is proud that I'm planning to take this step for keeps, and other parts of me (I'm assuming this is where the "addiction" thing comes from) is NOT happy about it. That part of me just wants to keep smoking... and surprise, it gets louder each and every day.
I still took my time today to go outside and stop for a cigarette. Starting tomorrow I'm going to stop myself from doing excessive breaks, and not have multiple cigarettes in one outing. I'm hoping to spend three of my waking hours sitting in a theater watching the (allegedly) epic "Avatar". I'll admit, I'm pretty excited. Hopefully we'll have a theater where we can watch in 3D. We'll see.
Back to smoking - it's very strange for me to think that somehow I've been smoking for over a third of my life. That seems like a long, LONG time... and in other ways it feels like I haven't been smoking all that long. The last 11 years have rightly FLOWN by... not as quick as the last 7 months (by the way - Forrest is 7 months old today).
Phew.
Tomorrow - further ruminations on the flow of time (sidebar blog) and then more on smoking.
Have a great Sunday everyone!
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